August
1998
August
1998
August 1, 1998
As it is finally August, I thought I'd let you all in on a little secret. I'm looney.
Looney, I tell ya. Looney! Looney! Looney!
August 2, 1998
Guar gum and xantham bean gum are common ingredients in most of the ice cream mass
produced in the United States. I can remember back on the farm when gramma used to gather
up the guar gum and xantham gum from the bottoms of desks in the old school house. She'd
have it stuck all over her hands and little brother and I knew we were in for a
treat--home made ice cream!
August 3, 1998
When I was but a wee little lad, me mum used to take me to the police station downtown on
a regular basis to be de-loused and fingerprinted. She said I needed to get used to it so
that I'd be ready for the "big house"...as she used to call it. That mum, always
good for a laugh.
August 4, 1998
Make sure you send me your VISA and/or MasterCard numbers ASAP. I'm collecting numbers for
an experiment.
August 5, 1998
Days like this make me think of days like the day before the third last to the last day of
the week. Which is just like Tuesdays and Wednesdays. And we all know that Tuesdays and
Wednesdays are much like Thursday, without all the glitter.
August 6, 1998
This could be the day that I finally win the lottery (if I'd just buy a ticket).
August 7, 1998
In the mid 70's there used to be this guy named Left Arm Louie who was the only man on the
planet to ever successfully juggle razor sharp Japanese throwing stars. He only did it
once, but it left a permanent impression on him. Plus the arm thing.
August 8, 1998
I went to my ten year high school reunion today and boy was I shocked. Everyone was
married, with kids and had jobs. You know, you think you can respect people when they are
in high school and then they all turn their backs on you.
August 9, 1998
We have spent a lot of time in this country preparing for certain natural disasters like
hurricanes, earthquakes, forest fires and tornadoes. But someday, people are going to be
taken off guard when gravity decides to reverse itself.
August 10, 1998
An empty teapot. Rose pedals. Twine. Fine lace. Linen. Rich Tapestries. Mrs. Fletcher. All
of these things were found in the stomach of the crocodile that got into that old
Victorian Mansion on the corner.
August 11, 1998
Tree sap is not something we think about too often. So, let's just take a few minutes to
ponder. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
. . . . there.
August 12, 1998
You'd think that with science as advanced as it is today, we'd develop giant umbrellas to
put over cities whenever really important outdoor car part shows are going on. To think,
we can put a man on the moon. Geesh.